This post is from contributor, Stacey Lane. This post is part of the Debt Free Homeschool feature.
After we became debt-free in 2008, our finances were kind of running on autopilot. We did not need to discuss many financial things; money came in and money went out, all according to plan.
Fast-forward to 2013 and with the mounting financial challenges, well, things have stopped running smoothly.
I wish I could say once you become debt-free you will always be financially secure. It seems God wants to remind me how to handle financial issues and rely on Him for our needs.
The past few months have been stressful. We’ve even had to learn to live without major appliances. The other day I threw myself on the ground and cried out for help. I handle the finances in our marriage, but with all the different things plaguing our budget, I need help. My husband wants nothing to do with the finances. It’s been years since he looked at anything other than his paycheck.
I did not realize how stressed I had become until the day my husband picked up the checkbook to write a check. I lost it. I am sure it was along the lines of, “You cannot touch the checkbook unless you know how much money is coming in and going out.”
My husband dropped the checkbook and ran for the hills. I have spent the last few weeks trying not to become bitter because he did not jump up and down to join in the financial struggles.
Maybe you have experience with your spouse not wanting to budget or discuss finances. I decided to open up my computer and search for what others had to say about it.
When Your Spouse Doesn’t Want to Help Manage the Budget
This focuses on 3 main reasons a spouse won’t discuss money, then gives ideas on how to overcome the hurdles. Mainly give grace for any money mistakes in the past.
If you are going to start a budget with your spouse, you need to include them in the process.
Dave Ramsey gives some tips on marriage and money and scripture verses about finances.
There are tips on discussing money goals with your spouse.
I loved the idea of forming a husband and wife team to handle finances.
Do not forget to share in financial victories with your spouse.
Focus on the Family offers tips for getting a budget together.
What does the Bible say about handling money in a marriage?
What does the Bible say about roles in handling money?
10 Bible verses on Encouragement
After reading blog posts and articles on finances and marriage, I wrote a list:
“5 Things I Need to Remember about Money and Marriage”
- I need to offer grace for past mistakes. I need to remind him I do not expect perfection or expect him to handle things the same way I do.
- I need to ask specifically for what I need help with on handling the finances. Right now I want him to know how difficult things are financially. I want him to help decide who gets paid this month. I do not expect him to balance the checkbook.
- I cannot expect my husband to change overnight. I need to take baby steps in bringing him up-to-date on the details of our finances.
- Don’t let this one area of struggle affect everything else. My husband has some amazing gifts and works hard to serve our family.
- I need to have faith. My God is so much bigger than this current problem.
Have you learned any lessons regarding money and marriage that you could share with us?
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Such an excellent resource list of articles!! So many bloggers talk about their success; it’s nice to know there are others out there that are still in process. Thanks, Stacey! 🙂